Fried. The Burnout Podcast
Cait Donovan
Recent Episodes
“What’s more important: being happy for having some stupid business card?” Asks Bryan Huhn, who joins FRIED today to discuss the relationship between financial stress and burnout, particularly when we allow the money we’re making—and the money we think we can’t live without—to convince us we need to remain in jobs that are making us miserable even to the point of illness. Bryan spent years valuing what people thought of him more than his own genuine passions and in an effort to people-please, pursued a career in finance rather than his dream of becoming a baseball coach. This led to a toxic cycle where his self-worth was tied to a job he had no passion for and therefore didn’t excel at, the stress of which, he believes, contributed to a cancer diagnosis in 2015.
With what he’s learned, he wants to help others make the most of their money so that they can create the best lives for themselves, and don’t have to spend another minute in jobs that they hate. As he explains to host Cait Donovan, this requires being brutally honest with yourself about where your money is going, what that says about what you value, and how you can start financially planning so that you can buy your freedom without wasting any more of that resource that is perhaps more valuable than money: your time.
This requires getting real with yourself, while at the same time refraining from judging yourself or comparing yourself to anyone else. Join today’s episode of FRIED to learn how your approach to financial planning will help you start to live your best life.
Quotes
- “That’s one thing I would say: Don’t ever compare. If there’s something you’ve been through, even if it seems really minor, it has a major impact on your life and the way your brain works. So, having that self-compassion, I think, is really important.” (4:43 | Bryan Huhn)
- “Money is imaginary. It literally is not real. We, as humans, just decided, ‘Hey, this thing, this piece of paper, this U.S. dollar is worth something and we all agree that it is, and that’s how we’re going to interact with one another and get the things we want. It could just as easily be Bitcoin. It’s not real, so why should your goal be to maximize how much of it you accumulate? No, the purpose of it is to live the best freaking life that you can possibly live.” (20:33 | Bryan Huhn)
- “OK, where’s my money going? So, what am I valuing? Because if you really want to know what someone cares about, look at their bank statement and their calendar. The time and the money. It’s a really good way to measure that. So, it almost forces you to do that deep work that so many people resist.” (27:35 | Bryan Huhn)
- “There’s no judgment there. It’s just being honest with yourself and I think a lot of times, especially in my industry, they make people feel really judged. It’s kind of cliche to hear a financial planner say, ‘Don’t spend six bucks on your Starbucks coffee every morning. Shut up. Don’t tell people what they should value, but help them figure it out and help them be brutally honest with themselves.” (30:13 | Bryan Huhn)
Links
Connect with Bryan Huhn:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/bryanhuhn/
Connect with Cait:
Initial Call with Cait: bit.ly/callcait
Initial Call with Sarah: bit.ly/callsarahv
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm
Ready to leave burnout behind for good? Join UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start reclaiming your energy and joy. Apply today! https://bit.ly/unfryapply
“The problem isn’t you; the problem is the toxic workplace,” explains host Caitlin Donovan on this latest #straightfromcait episode of FRIED, in which she discusses the dangers of returning to a toxic workplace only to repeat the burnout cycle again, as if you never made any recovery progress. Too often we’re led to believe that if we improve ourselves enough, we can develop an immunity against a bad environment, which, as Cait says, simply isn’t true.
On today’s episode, she explains why you should reconsider returning to your toxic workplace, and, if you do find yourself there, what to do if you find yourself unsupported. She discusses the common feelings of isolation, loneliness, emotional and mental paralysis and low self-esteem that accompany this scenario, and the devastating effects of bullies in the workplace.
You’ve come too far in your burnout recovery to jump back into the very situation that got you burned out in the first place. Join Cait today to learn the importance of being aware of, and listening to your body responses, to better detect and determine if your environment is safe.
Quotes
- “What happens, because of pop culture and pop psychology, is people assume that if they just get stronger, have better boundaries or can manage their emotions better, that somehow they will be able to manage and handle a toxic environment. That would be like saying, ‘If I just meditate enough, I can swim in toxic chemicals and they won’t bother my body.’ That’s just not true.” (2:56 | Caitlin Donovan)
- “There are a lot of people who explain that they, after something like this happens, are left with really low confidence. They’re feeling worthless, they feel socially isolated. They don’t know how to search for a new job; they’re nervous about searching for a new job. They’re wondering if they’ll ever be able to work again. Their social circle often doesn’t know how to respond, which is not their social circle’s fault, most people are just not educated well enough in the realms of burnout to have these conversations easily.” (6:37 | Caitlin Donovan)
- “And then that social isolation turns into loneliness, and you feel like the odd one out and you feel like, ‘Oh, my God, why is everybody around me making it in life and I can’t hang, I can’t hack it.’ And then that turns into a general feeling of despair.” (7:08 | Caitlin Donovan)
- “It only takes one bully, one crappy boss to set things totally sideways. And I know that people who work in HR and leaders don’t want to hear that one crappy boss can really ruin it like that for someone, but they can, and they do, and the cost is magnificent. The cost is immense for this person.” (9:38 | Caitlin Donovan)
Links
Connect with Cait:
Initial Call with Cait: bit.ly/callcait
Initial Call with Sarah: bit.ly/callsarahv
Ready to leave burnout behind for good? Join UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start reclaiming your energy and joy. Apply today! https://bit.ly/unfryapply
Podcast production and show notes provided by HiveCast.fm
Ready to leave burnout behind for good? Join UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start reclaiming your energy and joy. Apply today! https://bit.ly/unfryapply
“How do we rewrite the playbook together?” asks Daisy Auger-Dominguez, global leader, workplace strategist and author of the upcoming book “From Burnt Out to Lit Up,” on today’s episode of FRIED. The contemporary workplace is in major flux at the moment. In addition to being in collective burnout that we’ve just been able to give a name to, we’re also in what Daisy calls a “messy middle,” where workers are still learning how to effectively use their voices and leaders are trying to navigate these rapidly changing waters with archaic methods. So, how can leaders gain the skills to lead high-performing teams, shift workplace culture, and drive performance without causing more burnout? By showing up differently, modeling vulnerability and humanity for their workers, so that they feel seen, can heal, and eventually, help change the system from the inside out.
Today Daisy talks about what it takes to do such healing. It includes being conscious of your sacrifices, weighing the pros and cons of your decisions, replenishing your social battery and staying on top of your cultural debt. Many leaders fall into the trap of thinking they’re needed everywhere 24/7—when delegating not only eases the leader’s burden but lets capable workers shine.
Daisy explains how we can acknowledge the undue burden many groups experience in the workplace while exercising agency that helps not only us thrive but others as well. By rewriting the stories we tell ourselves, we help remodel the current paradigm of workplace culture into something better.
Quotes
- “That’s what we’re hoping for from our leaders. We’re hoping that they will help us, get us to the other side, and that they will do so vulnerably; that they will do so with humanity; and that they will do so in a way that allows us to feel seen, validated and understood so that we can deliver to our best capacity.” (9:24 | Daisy Auger-Dominguez)
- “I do believe that when you tell the world that you have boundaries, you tell the world that you matter. But I also think …what I do for me is also what I model for others so that—they don’t have to do what I’m doing, but they can create the conditions where they can thrive.” (20:40 | Daisy Auger-Dominguez)
- “One of the practices in the book that I share is about reframing our narratives, reframing our stories, because for a long time, the story I told myself was, ‘As a woman… As a woman of color…’’ all these ‘only’ characteristics that you have, I needed to show up differently. And to be fair, and this is to your naysayer listener, I had to. I really did have to.” (24:07 | Daisy Auger-Dominguez)
- “I know the system has failed me, but how do I exercise my agency to figure out how I thrive in this way, and by doing that, help change the system? Because by my figuring out, ‘How do I show up differently, and ‘How do I help others show up differently,’ we help build that new leadership. We were just talking about how most leaders are using the same old playbook. Well, how do we rewrite the playbook together?” (27:02 | Daisy Auger-Dominguez)
Links
Connect with Daisy Auger-Dominguez:
https://www.daisyauger-dominguez.com
https://www.instagram.com/daisyaugerdominguez/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/daisyaugerdominguez/
Connect with Cait:
Initial Call with Cait: bit.ly/callcait
Initial Call with Sarah: bit.ly/callsarahv
Burnout doesn’t have to be your story. Apply to UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start your journey toward lasting recovery. Spots are limited—apply now! https://bit.ly/unfryapply
Ready to leave burnout behind for good? Join UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start reclaiming your energy and joy. Apply today! https://bit.ly/unfryapply
“What kind of 85-year-old do you want to be?” asks Cathy Richards, exercise physiologist, wellness coach and best-selling author of “Boom! Six Steps to Living a Longer, Healthier Life” who joins the podcast to help us learn what we can do to protect our brains against neurodegenerative diseases such as dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease. The habits we build now—starting with as little as just five minutes a day—will help, in large part, to determine the quality of our later years.
The best thing you can do? Get moving. This doesn’t have to mean exercise. Cathy and Cait discuss the power of movement to not only yield physical benefits such as weight loss, but helps to promote neuroplasticity that will help us develop healthier thoughts and, ultimately, belief systems. The point is to build small consistent habits over time.
The future is coming faster than we think. Though none of us has entire control over it, we can begin today to form the best version of ourselves in the future.
Quotes
- “I will say that I think that sleep is one of the biggest things we can do…I don’t think in general that sleep is protected as much and it’s not part of American culture to get enough sleep, I would say, in my opinion. I feel like we’re always deciding if we have more to do, we just stay up late and we get up early.” (9:32 | Cathy Richards)
- “Totally modest investment of time can yield enormous benefits. It doesn’t have to be a lot, it doesn’t have to be complicated and we really can’t afford not to. That’s the thing, if we could prescribe movement, whether it’s for migraines, or whatever it is, or whatever your problem, movement can fix it, or can help fix it. Almost every single solitary time.” (17:30 | Cathy Richards)
- “People get stressed out thinking, ‘What do I need to do to prevent my heart disease?...what do I need to do to protect my brain?’ Guess what? It’s all the same list…Moving your body has more impact on your brain function than anything else you could do.” (33:18 | Cathy Richards)
- “You don’t turn into the kind of 85-year-old that’s in a nursing home versus traveling the world at 84. We’re building the kind of 85-year-old we want to be right now.” (47:52 | Cathy Richards)
Links
Connect with Cathy Richards:
https://www.cathyrichards.net/blog/taking-a-year-to-inspire-vitality-in-yourself https://www.cathyrichards.neet
https://www.instagram.com/inspiringvitality
https://www.linkedin.com/in/cathymrichards/
https://www.cathyrichards.net/brainpower.html https://www.facebook.com/groups/intentionallivingandlongevity
Connect with Cait:
Initial Call with Cait: bit.ly/callcait
Initial Call with Sarah: bit.ly/callsarahv
Burnout doesn’t have to be your story. Apply to UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start your journey toward lasting recovery. Spots are limited—apply now! https://bit.ly/unfryapply
Ready to leave burnout behind for good? Join UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start reclaiming your energy and joy. Apply today! https://bit.ly/unfryapply
“We really need to break our limitations of what we say rest is,” says Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, a board-certified internal medicine physician, internationally renowned thought leader on well-being, and author of the bestselling book “Sacred Rest: Recover Your Life, Renew Your Energy, Restore Your Sanity.” By overwhelming demand, Dr. Saundra joins the FRIED podcast to discuss the seven types of rest, which she explains is distinct from—but nonetheless essential to—sleep. She’ll explain how you can determine in which area of your life—from the mental, physical and emotional, to the sensorial, spiritual and creative—-you are experiencing the greatest rest deficit, and how you can begin to fill those empty buckets amidst your busy life, not around it.
Along the way she reveals some surprising insights about the nature of rest and unpacks some of our most enduring misconceptions about it. Often what we think of as rest is really more work and when we think we are relaxing we are just indulging ourselves. She explains the difference between fitting in and true belonging, why trauma dumping can actually cause more stress, and why that watercolor painting class is not as creatively restoring as you may think it is.
Over 250,000 people have discovered their personal rest deficit with Dr. Saundra’s help. Join today’s episode to learn how you can discover yours and start your journey toward overcoming burnout and living your best life.
Quotes
- “I got to this point where I realized all of the work and energy that I put into building that life that looks so good, I could put the same energy into building a life that actually felt good, and that actually was a life that was satisfying and did give me the things that I desire.” (4:49 | Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith)
- “Do something. Don’t settle for exhaustion. I feel like that’s the culture we’ve lived in. We’ve settled for, ‘Well this is just how everybody feels. Everybody’s burnt out. Everyone’s exhausted. Nobody’s happy.’ It’s not true. It’s a lie.” (13:51 | Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith)
- “I think for a lot of people, we feel like sleep is the end all/be all of rest. And so we try to bypass all other forms of stress and just go straight to, ‘Give me six, seven, eight hours of deep, restorative sleep,’ and that’s just not the reality of it. You can pop pills all day, you’re not going to have restorative sleep. It just doesn’t work like that. It’s something that comes when your body, your mind, your spirit, your relationships, all of those components of rest feel safe, they feel rested. So, then it’s like your whole self is able to completely go into the truly helpless state of deep, restorative sleep.” (17:32 | Saundra Dalton-Smith)
- “Fifty years ago…we trained our brains for memorization, concentration and focus, whereas now we train our brains to multitask.” (21:08 | Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith)
Links
Connect with Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith:
https://www.drdaltonsmith.com/
https://www.instagram.com/drdaltonsmith
https://www.linkedin.com/in/drdaltonsmith/
Connect with Cait:
Initial Call with Cait: bit.ly/callcait
Initial Call with Sarah: bit.ly/callsarahv
Burnout doesn’t have to be your story. Apply to UNFRIED: A Small Group Burnout Recovery Program and start your journey toward lasting recovery. Spots are limited—apply now! https://bit.ly/unfryapply